Dwarf King Kong

Dwarf ‘King Kong’ Charged In $3000 Extortion In K. C.

By The Associated Press

KANSAS CITY, Jan. 22. – Herbert Hayes, who federal bureau of investigation agents say, signed an extortion note “King Kong”, although he is only five feet, three inches tall and weighs but 105 pounds, was indicted this afternoon by a federal grand Jury.

Arrested this morning, Hayes was formally Charged by the grand jury this afternoon with using the mails in an attempt to extort $3000 from Alfred R. Wallace, department store official.

W. A. Smith, special agent in charge of the F. B. I. office here, says Hayes, a former Missouri state penitentiary convict, signed a statement admitting he wrote the note. He was found yesterday in the reading room of the public library by federal officers acted on a telephone call from an unidentified informer.

Bigger, Better Cuss Words…


Chicago. Dec. 22 (AP) Bigger and better cuss words have been suggested by Dr. Burges Johnson, professor of English at Syracuse university, as one of the things this country needs. He told the executive club about it yesterday.

Profanity that was horrifying a few decades back Is now ridiculous in its innocuousness. Dr. Johnson said. Some of the stronger cuss words have been corrupted until now they lack all their original power and significance.

“Gramercy” “Gadzooks” and “Zounds” are some of the corruptions of what once was powerful profanity, he said. Even the words that remain have lost their full power through over-usage, and there have come into the language no new swear words to replace them.

Martian Chamber of Commerce Bulletin.

According to the description, an honest Chamber of Commerce bulletin from Mars would have to read:

“Settle on Mars, one of the first heavenly bodies to cool off after creation. We have practically no water, practically no oxygen in our atmosphere. The oxygen has gone to the rocks, and much of our country is covered with fine red dust, caused by the oxidation of our iron deposits.

“The dust doesn’t stay put, however, because we have winds of gale force almost all of the time, cause by the rapid changes in our temperature – up to 80 degrees at noontime and down to 100 degrees below zero at night.

“We have no twilight, and no dawn. Our daytime sky is no brighter than twilight on Earth, but there’s every chance of romance here. We have two nice moons, one which remains 132 hours above the horizon. Our nearer moon, Phobos, is as close to us as New York to Los Angeles on Earth. And, if you like eclipses, they are a dime a dozen up here. We have as many as 1,000 of them each year.

“Come, spend a year with us, You’ll have plenty of time to look around, because our year is 687 days. And girls – if you happen to weigh around 200 pounds, you’ll find life can be beautiful on Mars, because here, you’ll weight less than eighty.”

(excerpt from the The Courier-Journal, Louisville, Kentucky • Sun, Jul 23, 1939)

The Adventures of Rocky Jordan

Jack Moyles

“Again we bring you a story of Adventure with a man named Rocky Jordan, proprietor of the Cafe Tambourine which stands in a narrow street off of Cairo’s native quarter within sight of the Mosque Sultan Hassan, The Cafe Tambourine crowded with forgotten men from the world’s waterfront, alive with the babble of many languages.”

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